i have some lameness underneath

Cornelius tickled me hysterically last night.. So I thought why not share the lameness to the world~

What is the STRONGEST animal?

*Answer to be posted in the next update...*

she might appear meek but strong

Today is one of the least productive days I had as always. Started with a long sleep and a healthy breakfast, my laziness ate me up again. Later in the afternoon, I attended a seminar on colours by Denise Turner in college and it was seriously good! I was paying attention so futilely, I'm surprised! :D

Droplets of rain poured down harshly at about 5.30pm in the evening right after I reached home from college. I prayed so badly for the rain to stop but it didn't. And I was supposed to meet up with Joan for dinner at 6.30pm. Despite the rain, we went for dinner in Paramount Garden. So here's the thing; the gist of this post.

Joan ordered fish porridge while I ordered claypot chicken rice with extra salted fish. *yum* After we're bloated from the heavily-carb-ED meal, I saw this old lady making a living selling "Lor Bak", an assortment of deep fried meaty products with some special sauce. I just couldn't help myself to buy something from the poh poh. She look pretty meek and already touching 7 decades. I wonder if she is in pain because she's hunching with osteoporosis; a bad one mind you! And she reminds me of my late grandma. SO, I bloated myself even more with the otak-otak and fried meaty stuff I over-ordered and dragged Joan to eat with me. I just could not see an old person selling things. I will buy regardless of any products. Take it as a weakness but it's damn-it-ly true; I will buy. Hmm.. Aren't they suppose to enjoy life at this stage of life? Hmm.. I feel bad and sad for them. Where are their kids? How is she going to carry all those heavy stuff? Or wash the plates and utensils? Gosh! This is hurting me!

I am definitely not letting my mom being like this in the future! She'll get the luxury of life when she completely retires. Same thing applied to my dad. Hm.. I have to have a motivator to get my going in my assignments. Dang! Right after this slumber~ toodles!

*Can't wait for the shopping spree*

24.11.08

The morning sun tells a story,
rays of light so bright,
trying to make its way through the semi opaque curtains,
not a jolt nor a ring of sensation
could tell my soul, "it's a brand new day"

The morning sun tells another story,
it's time to start anew
trying to burn my spirit to jump off slumber
deep within my weak body
my soul wondered, "what happened yesterday?"

The morning sun tells yet another story,
it's time to remain in slumber
pondering what God's game plan
with a little jounce of vim
I covered my cold self, "it's time for rest"

*..headache..fever..sketches..dissertation..food..blogging..model..tired..sleepy..*

why am i still here?

Life could be so zig-zaggy sometimes, you wouldn't like it!

Fresh from the cinema hall where I was almost dozed off watching Madagascar 2 ... Africa... (geez,I don't even remember the complete title of the movie), so anywayz, I was yawning dramatically in the car all the way back home. Completing house chores and some little grooming was the last thing to do before heading off to bed. Tonight I felt a little different. Before the movie started, I was talking to Kathryn about relationships. (oh! she's just my housemate) It seems she had a whole different perception of what love is all about and that past experiences made her forget what love is and for her confused what love really meant to her. In my life right now, at this phase, I don't see a relationship as a good thing but rather a commitment. Thus, friendship is the only option I opt for each time I meet someone new.

Let's just put it this way. I met this girl couple of months ago in a party. She is fine, pretty shy in the beginning and she's just a friend's friend. This is when facebook comes in real handy. I got tagged in an album with pictures of the party and she instantly messaged me. To my surprise, I was like "..err... isn't this girl the girl I met in Jo's party?" Since then, things blossomed quite nicely and rather sweet I would say. Until one day, when gestures and gimmicks were interpreted wrongly that it turned out to be what might be a serious relationship. I was instantly drawn back because it was a huge commitment I wasn't ready to commit. I ain't gonna hurt a girl's heart if I weren't thinking thoroughly. With that, I gave the opportunity a go. It went away and never return.

Few days back, I received another facebook message from a girl I barely know. ( I don't even know why she's in my friends' list) In the second message, she gave me her phone number. Yes! Desperate I don't know but it certainly freaked me out a LOT! and it is actually quite a turn down. In fact it is a huge no-no for me. Not trying to generalise but why are these girls so daring and outspoken that their instant introduction would be, "You can call or sms me at 01x-xxxxxxx". I'm so not buying it.

People do ask me why, why don't I get a girlfriend. My housemates are pouring that sort of questions and it is now a chant! Blame me for being the only guy (just the two of us actually) left unattached after my roommate got hitched by my housemate. I seriously told them it is just a burden and commitment I am not ready to handle. I let opportunities go just like that without thinking if there's more to come or probably that last one I let go would be the last for me. Can that possibly happen? Am I doing the right thing? For now, I'll leave it at the hands of God.

"Our lives are like crossroads. He chose our paths and if our paths crossed, that is fate - God's will and God's wondrous work."

*I'll just head to bed right now. My mind's relieved.*

things i'm looking forward to....

2008 serves a beautiful array of life experiences I look forward to. I went through a lot of ups and downs in the earlier few months but I shook the bad off and embrace the good and now am more than happy to experience more excitements! Though I might sometimes whine about how bad I was with time management, how I could not cope with the ongoing assignments overlapping with the current stuffs I'm running, it is time for me to say "WHO CARES?! I JUST WANNA ENJOY LIFE WHEN I AM STILL BREATHING APIECE!" After all, assignments is not that stressful as I may put it sometimes. Really, there's actually sufficient time to complete everything while enjoying caroling practice in church 4 days a week and play Scrabble every night and day~ LOL

List of things I look forward to :

# Malacca Scrabble Open Challenge 2008
This tournament was initiated impromptu-ly after the Malaysian Nationals. A-two-month preparation saw every drop of hardwork being put into this tourney and it is definitely going to be a successful one! Let's hope it will not be in the red.

# Lifeline Caroling Project
Last year, I was brought closer to God and the Church through music. After my quite-active involvement in the Lifeline Music Ministry, I felt the sense of belonging to the Church and since then, I never hesitated to give the best I can to the Church, people in need and especially to the Almight GOD. I look forward for the great chemistry with the choir, good Christmas experience, visiting the orphanages and old folks, performing in commercial places - IKEA, IKANO, One Utama, One World, and also the yummy yummy sinful food! It's time to break the weighing scale!

# Christmas Holidays
It's the time of the year again to spend the joy of Xmas with friends and family before marking the end of 2008. *time flies so so fast!* The real meaning of Xmas is to give more than receiving. I feel more than happy to give my time and sing praises to God to collect enough proceedings for the needy. It really reflects the true meaning of Xmas. I can't wait to go back to Malacca too! It'll be superb! Shepherd pie... Sujee Cake...

... but for now, it'll be tutorials... will have to go see Ms Joanne later at 1am... And I'm still in the midst of completing..

*back to work right after this bowl of cereal*

Tagged by zizi

Starting time : 10:29

Name : Gabriel Martin

Sisters : Godsisters count not?

Brothers : One - Matthew

Shoe size : 9

Height : slightly shorter than 170

Where do you live : Sek 17, PJ

Have you ever...
Been on a plane : Yes..

Swam in the ocean : Sort of..

Fallen asleep at school : Hell yes!

Broken someone’s heart : I think so..

Fell off your chair : err.. During primary school kot.. don't really remember..

Sat by the phone all night waiting for someone to call : Not really.. my phone seldom rings

Saved e-mails : if it's important.. yes

What is your room like : IKEA-ish.. but still it's not what I wanted

What’s right beside you: another chair..

What is the last thing you ate : cereal with bananas..

Chicken pox : at the age of 16..

Sore throat : After any events that required shouting..

Stitches : no..still perfectly fine~

Broken nose : NO! In fact, I have a err.........*let's not boast*

Do you believe in love at first sight : Nah..

Like picnics : The last time I had one was more than 10 years ago..

Who is the person...
You last danced with : my housemate.. wonder who went last... hmm.. PauYin, Cani or Kathyrn?

Who last made you smile : last night..?

You last yelled at : I'm quite discreet and decent ler.. hmm.. NO ONE!

Today did you…
Talk to someone you like : not yet...

Kiss anyone : err... no..

Get sick : flu...

Talk to an ex : no

Miss someone : of coz I dO!

Who do you really hate: already forgiven!

Do you like your hand-writing : I get jealous looking at others'

Are your toe nails painted : eeuuww... NO!

Whose bed other than yours would you rather sleep in: *shit i'm stuck*

What color shirt are you wearing now : white

Are you a friendly person : I can be.... vice versa

Do you have any pets : Kell, the stolen dog and now is Spark, the annoying pest! hmph!

Do you sleep with the TV on : Sometimes..

What are you doing right now : Typing.. Eating breakie..

Can you handle the truth : Most of the time...

Are you closer to your mother or father : Mummy

Do you eat healthy : Apparently I do..

Do you still have pictures of you & your ex : Nope...

If you’re having a bad day, who are you most likely to go to : No one.. bad day means being alone!

Are you loud or quiet most of the time : Animated... I can be both.. haha it depends on situation and how I feel at that point of time..

Are you confident : Not all the time


5 things I was doing 10 years ago:
- Playing teng-teng and tiang with my classmates
- Putting on a LOT of weight
- Fell into the longkang outside my house.. yes.. EEEUUUWWWW !!
- Watch Kelab Disney Malaysia
- made my first Chiffon cake! yes.. :D

5 things I would do if I were a billionaire:
- Buy lots of clothes
- Travel to places around the globe
- Go for liposuction, body stretching and body sculpting! LOL
- Bring my parents to the Holy Land
- Buy a house!

5 of my bad habits:
- Being very lazy and wasting time
- NOT being punctual
- I misplace things all the time
- No spending control or limit
- like Zizi, very impatient at times

5 places I’ve lived:
- Jln Pokok Mangga, Melaka
- Sek 17, PJ
- Bandar Utama
- PJS 7, Sunway
- Puchong

5 People I am tagging:
- Adelyn
- Claire
- Jojojon
- Shaun Damien
- Wendy

*Wow.. it's already 11am! Going to HOMEDEC!*

in the midst of procrastination

We had a quite amusing presentation today after a stringent tutorial exercise marathon; whatever you guys decide to call it. Things went okay despite our structure being totally 'naturally deconstructed' when we came in the morning. For now, I'll let the picture do the talking.

*my eyes are swollen, face are oh-so-dark!*

run.... run....

I am really feeling exhausted at this point of time and I really wanted to let it ALL out! I thought I could go jogging in Taman Jaya but it's quite late right now due to long hours of tutorials. I wonder if I've committed myself to too many commitments? Caroling? Church? Scrabble? But my focus has to be on my studies! Why am I doing this? urgh! I'm feeling so not good right now. Stress led me to more food and I'm getting fatter!

Sometimes I wonder why carolling practice consumed so much time? I personally felt that there's an air of over-ambitiousness in the room and with the amount of time left, we wouldn't be able to finish practising all the song and to polish the quality before the performance. I don't want to have another torment during the performance. Everyone have to commit in one way or another but if the commitment is too heavy, I'm afraid I can't cope. I wanted to pull out from this project so badly but I can't deny the fact that music and singing praises to God releases stress and help me feel a lot better and calmer. Besides, I felt the connection with the Church each time I'm around a group of really nice people altogether singing praises to God. *skip skip skip*

I ydread to go to college tomorrow! Why? We're busy people. I'll make sure Wednesday is a free day to do assignments. I don't even have the time to read books for my dissertation. I kept renewing the books for 2 months already. It's seriously annoying! I don't know why time passes so fast! I don't know if I can take it any longer. People said I can cope and overcome. I don't have the hope to overcome this at this point of time! I need more food~ I so need more food~

Okay, I'm not trying to be sceptical or whatsoever, like when things have not been done, you can't tell what will happen or you won't know if it'll be a success but at this point of time, I just really want to let go many things! I want to LET GO~

*heads to kitchen to prepare some pasta dish*

i'm so screwed

I basically just did nothing the whole day. I'm so screwed, so stucked! I am basically S..C..R..E..E..A..M..I..I..N..G for HELP~!!!

I'm quite in a lost state right now. I don't know what I am doing and I don't know what I should do! I just wish all these miseries stop right at this moment! I dread a lot of things and why must this feeling drown me at this moment? It's so not helping!

*I'm not happy!*

milk and oatmeal

I am a little unsober right now. Pondered upon what I did today was just simply amazing and I felt so contented. At least I did got some leisure time for myself.. I do deserve it you know....

Weekend was the day of obligation for us Catholics as we celebrate the All Saint's and All Soul's Day. I went to mass on Saturday and I remember how the priest was telling us about the day of obligation is the day of REST. *ya right!* I barely could even have the time to sit down and breathe that time as there was so many things to rush for the Interim Crit session. And the fact that one sheet of presentation board took me 2 hours to complete really irritated the hell out of me! I completed everything at 12am on Sunday when my housemates were all hungry and craving for KFC. So, against all diet rules and regulations, I went to KFC and had a dinner plate! It was so SINFUL but I deserved every bit of pamper at that moment and I really didn't care about getting fat! *skip skip skip*

I woke up today feeling all so sober and nice, knowing that I completed almost all of the requirements when suddenly my mind was telling me I missed something. It was figurating in my mind and the image which was playing in the dark that moment just struck me awake and I quickly went to draw and wrote out what I was thinking in my pre-awaken state. As I was having my daily dosage of cereal, fruit and milk, I continued writing and sketching to add up to the already-satisfying boards I did last night. All the procrastinating and chit chatting led me to college right at the nick of time - minutes before 1pm.

I was to present last. *how boring* The Crit started at about 1.30 and I started my presentation at about 4-ish. It was quite okay but I choked a lil' while trying to summarize; ended up reading exactly what I wrote on the boards. I realised I did quite a lot and I am liking the progress and the decisions I made. Just a share of thought, my concept for my final project is 'Anatomy Contortion'. And YES! I've taken this concept and no one's taking it away from me! :P

The sky decided to shower right before the presentation ended and it was quite a heavy one. I got into the car with my back and hair partially wet - was I that quick of a runner? I picked Valerie up to TESCO for some grocery shopping and a quality leisure outing together. I bought quite a lot of stuff, especially milk as it was so cheap! Thus, my shopping list was completed! - greens, eggs, ham, mushrooms, macaroni, milk, raisins bran and more milk. I need to continue eating healthy as I felt the difference since I changed my eating habit. *big flashy smile! :D*

After grocery shopping, we went to The Curve for a light dinner. I went to BORDERS first for my monthly dosage of magazines. For dinner, I picked O' Briens as I'd not been there for quite some time and I am craving for the Hot Choc. So we ordered a sandwich each and Val ordered mushroom soup which tasted quite good! Then, we walked to Ikano for some on-the-shopping-list stuff. Val was too tired by then and we decided to go home. It was 9pm.

I reached home feeling so contented and happy that I did not waste a minute today. However, I felt so tired that I took a so-called nap which lasted till midnight and here I am! I need to start enjoying life I think, like what I did today. I feel so much relaxed and happier; apart from the gruelling assignments which might be quite lethal nowadays. I'm writing quite a lot at this point of time. I'm being whiny right? But it's satisfaction for me. Noticing that no one gives comments or feedbacks, I assumed no one actually reads my blog aye? So I'll just have my syok-sendiri sessions by myself~

*Abba Father, bless my friends with good health, that all their suffering and pain be offer up to you Lord, and you give them the strength and perseverence to stay strong and fight the pain. I pray that you lift up their spirit and not lose faith in you O Lord... Amen*